Among the hullabaloo of European football this week, the takeaway news story was Craig Shakespeare’s sacking as Leicester City boss. After scripting a great start to his tenure, toil and trouble ensued and the answer was it was not to be.
At least his temporary successor can take heart via a little digging on past caretaker reigns, as Terry Connor and much more feature in this week’s Premier League bingo…
Michael Appleton researching Terry Connor’s caretaker reign for reassurance
Following Craig Shakespeare’s shock sacking from Leicester, it was confirmed assistant manager and perennial fancied-for-mediocre-Championship-job man Michael Appleton would take caretaker charge. Generally* there’s not much expectation as a caretaker manager, and therefore nothing to lose.
*Terry Connor won none of his 14 games in caretaker charge of Wolverhampton Wanderers, losing nine times. Also, this:
Sean Dyche flat-batting links to the Leicester job with an unnecessarily long answer
With the growly quality in his voice of a wilting lawnmower, Dyche goes about his media duties with outstanding enthusiasm, which is as admirable as draining. He’s the bookies’ favourite for the Leicester job and is sure to be quizzed on the role in his pre-match press conference. Having the spotlight on his dedication to Burnley will doubtless cause a passionate soliloquy from Dyche, who in a previous interview used the word “aligned” EIGHT TIMES to describe his attachment to the club.
Deeney’s use of “cojones” sparking more maybe-pile punditry language
Interviewing players who don’t speak in clichés is always uplifting for viewers, Troy Deeney being one of the best. When speaking live on BT Sport of Arsenal’s main weakness, the Watford hitman said: “I have to watch what I say but having a bit… cojones I think the word is; having a bit of nuts.” The only worry is this sort of language may stoke Alan Pardew’s fire, though if he also warns, “I have to watch what I say,” that could offer the producer time to select ‘mute’.
Wondering when Kevin de Bruyne’s voice will break
It’s been a terrific week for serial defence-splitter and whipping genius Kevin de Bruyne. Typically, he registered another assist Tuesday night with a pinpoint driven cross for Gabriel Jesus as City defeated hipster-friendly Napoli 2-1. But after the game KdB was seen being restrained by teammates as he tried to speak with the officials. “Let me talk! Let me talk! Let me taaaalk,” said the Belgian, sounding like a frustrated 14-year-old being told off in the headteacher’s office.
People ‘in the game’ remaining in denial that Rooney is world-class
As Everton limped towards a 1-1 draw against Brighton last week – thanks more to Bruno’s elbow than anything else – manager Ronald Koeman commended Rooney’s composure on the last-minute penalty as “world class”. It’s a common theme among players-turned-pundits to, understandably, stay loyal to their comrades rather than slag them off. But come on, Ronald – Rinus Michels didn’t have sleepless nights of soccer brainstorming for you to hail today’s Wayne Rooney world class.
Discovering Zaha has the calming voice of a fictional train on the Island of Sodor
In a world where churnalism is becoming more and more frequent, BBC One’s Premier League Show offers a traditional, magazine format which is refreshingly raw and insightful. Last week Wilfred Zaha was interviewed, who turns out be, ha, an absolute legend. He does have, however, the most bizarre voice. He has dulcet tones to rival Bob Ross, but the slow-speaking, articulate winger is perhaps more suited towards being one of Thomas the Tank Engine’s mates.
